In a realm where dreams danced with reality, there lived a deer named Gabriel. Gabriel was gentle and kind, but he was often anxious and unsure of himself. He longed for the approval of others, especially since his mother, a beautiful swan, always made him feel he needed to prove his worth. His father, a brave eagle, had promised to be perfect for his swan mother, which made Gabriel feel he had to be perfect too.
One day, Gabriel met a fox named Elara. Elara was cunning and beautiful, but she carried deep wounds from her past. Her father, a stern lion, had trapped her in a tower of high expectations, making her distrustful of others. She saw Gabriel’s kindness and decided to use it for her own gain.
“Gabriel,” Elara said with a sweet smile, “I need your help to break free from my past. Only you can save me.”
Gabriel, eager to be needed, agreed. He followed Elara through the forest, completing tasks and trials she set for him. Each task made him feel more anxious, but he couldn’t stop. He believed he had to prove his worth to Elara, just as he had tried with his parents.
Elara, sensing Gabriel’s fears, whispered promises of friendship and love. But whenever Gabriel got too close, she pulled away, leaving him in despair. She felt powerful seeing Gabriel’s distress, believing it made her stronger.
One night, as Gabriel lay under a great oak tree, he spoke to himself. “Why do I feel so sad and tired? I do everything to make Elara happy, but it’s never enough.”
The wise old owl perched above heard him and said, “Gabriel, true strength does not come from others’ approval. Look within yourself and see your own worth. Only then will you find peace.”
Gabriel thought deeply about the owl’s words. He realized that seeking Elara’s approval was like chasing shadows. He remembered his mother’s demanding ways and his father’s impossible promises. Understanding that his worth was his own to recognize, he decided to change.
The next day, Gabriel spoke to Elara. “Elara, I can no longer do these tasks for you. I must care for myself and find my own strength.”
Elara, surprised and angered, accused him of being selfish. “You are too sensitive and controlling, Gabriel. How can you abandon me?”
But Gabriel stood firm. “No, Elara. I see now that I must respect myself. I forgive my parents for their burdens, and I forgive you for your games. But I will no longer play them.”
With this, Gabriel felt a weight lift from his heart. He stood taller, his coat shone brighter, and he transformed into a magnificent buck. Elara watched in awe as he walked away, realizing she had lost a true friend by trying to control him.
Moral of the Fable
In the enchanted forest, Gabriel learned that true strength lies in understanding and respecting oneself. By embracing his true nature and forgiving past mistakes, he found inner peace and harmony.
We are hard wired for self esteem. We know if our block structure stands or falls. We know if we can’t catch a ball. Programs that give stars rating performance neutralize that internal judgement mechanism. As a therapist with chn I would look at their drawing and remark, ‘you use a lot of blue.’ I would withold compliments. After 3-4 meeings, they would happily show me a drawing. Clearly they liked it. Their hard wired fair self judgement had kicked in. I had to counsel parents, cut down on the compliments. Esteem cannot be programmed.